Hope?

For those who are wondering, yes I am learning a lot. Besides becoming extremely adept at one-handed-ass-wiping, I have been exposed to a whole slew of depressing, soul crushing realities. For example, everyone is being exploited. Fun, yes?

On the health form that I filled out for IHP I was asked if I was mentally sound, because this program caused a lot of stress. I merrily checked "yes, of course I am mentally sound!" because I am, for all intents and purposes. What they failed to tell you is that you, the eager student, would be routinely bombarded with hopeless situation after hopeless situation...failed projects, crushed dreams, and disenfranchisment everywhere, in your face, at all times. Everything is hurting someone, somewhere, and even the best intentions are complete shit when looked at with a critical eye. What has happened, dear reader, is that we (the human race) have become inexticably tangled in a broken system that encompasses, dare I say engulfs, everything we know. The most terrifying part is that we have made it all up, like a childhood game gone terribly terribly wrong.

Recall long ago the overbearing friend who would not stop playing the game, even after you stood up and said "i really don't want to play anymore!" They would follow you every where, still in character, until you couldn't even remember what your real friend was like any more. In fact you kind of hated this obnoxious person. They were really not your friend anymore, because friends just don't do that. You wished that you could univite them from your birthday party but you can't because every body else still likes them. Thats capitalism. And its hurting a lot of feelings.

I make jokes about it because the reality is simply too severe and damaging. This system is Fucked Up. I have been trying to think of a life for myself that does not entail buying into the system, but that life has a niche all its own. We are surrounded. The only thing to do is create a whole new world...and it is going to be really hard. Luckily, I think I we can do it. Somewhere beyond all the dead ends there is a glimmer of light, and I can still see it. Im letting y'all know because when I get back, I expect a revolution from all of you. Yes, that means you.

Hop to it.